I just got back from my weekend up in the mountains and all that fun stuff. On our way driving home, we stopped at this amazing smokehouse. I don't remember what its called, but they had buffalo jerky, elk jerky, beef jerky, turkey jerky, you name it, and it all tasted amazing. While we were there, we bought a smoked pigs ear for my dog. It was just simple smoked, nothing special. My dog fucking loves the shit out of it, and my sister is terrified and grossed out by it. So given the circumstances, I rigged up this thing. I tied a pole to the sledding harness we have for my dog and made it so I could tie the pigs ear to it and have it dangle a foot in front of my dog's face.
My dog is just trotting around, trying to catch her treat, when my sister goes by. She freaks out and starts running. Like, zombie apocalypse type running. My dog sits there like, this must be a game, and chases after her. So we have a little hilarious scenario here. My sister running like there's no tomorrow, the pigs ear maybe a foot behind her, and my dog another foot behind. My dog catches up to her and the ear touches my sister in the arm and she freaks out, yelling things like "EW EW EW EW GET THAT AWAY EWWWWWW" So I walk up so calmly, take the ear off the string and pole set up, tie it to my sister's head like its her own ear, and walk away. She loses her shit, rips it off, and runs into her room and doesn't speak to me the rest of the day. That made my day right there.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I dug out an old story my friend Dana wrote for English class in 7th grade. And I swear to god she's gonna end up writing horror stories for a living. I just copied it into a google doc a half hour ago. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DaQAtbBJs0ya03yeGp2X83NTN7xRJjXKoG7LbNtju1U/edit?usp=sharing Seriously read it. Its one of her best stories.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I had a bit of a mini freak out earlier. I was at dinner, with my family, and a wild lesbian couple appears. They sit down a few tables away, and immediately snuggle up to eachother. Like. They looked so happy and comfortable together. If they weren't what seemed like they were making jokes or telling the other they loved them, they were talking to the waitress, who I think was hitting on both of them, but that's just my opinion.
These two were just so in to eachother. They were constantly kissing, hugging, laughing, and just having a good time. And it was absolutely adorable. The people sitting at the table behind us were making comments such as: "Jeez, they should at least get a room, if not stop that sinful crap right now" And that just pissed me off so much. I wanted to say something, but I was with my parents, and that wouldn't go over well.
I really think we should encourage lesbian and gay couples to be comfortable in public, and encourage equal treatment between gay and straight couples. Because this is seriously not cool. Why can't they be happy together and show a little PDA just like you can? It isn't right to judge people by sexuality and things like that. If you're a man and you want to kiss your wife in public, fine. If you're a woman, and want to kiss your husband in public, fine. If you're a man, and want to kiss your husband in public, fine. If your're a woman and you want to kiss your wife in public, fine. Just let it go. Let people be who they feel they are. You aren't god, asshole. Get over yourself.
~Rant over XD
~Jason
Check out my *New* Advice Blog!
11 years ago
